Grizabella
by Crawler
Summary: Munkustrap muses on the return of Grizabella during the Jellicle Ball. Ritzkin Arc 10


Title: Grizabella (Ritzkin Arc 10)  
Rating: PG for a couple bad words  
Summary: Munkustrap's POV, musing on Grizabella's return to the Jellicle tribe during the Ball

I apologize for the delay in both writing and posting this piece. I've recently transferred from nowheresville, Michigan, to the most expensive and exclusive district of LONDON! I am in ENGLAND! And, even better, I HAVE A JOB WITH THE BRITISH MUSEUM!

Self-congratulating aside, I've been busy both packing and preparing for this trip and then unpacking and getting settled in. I'm here in England for three months, and, with luck, I'll get to see the UK Cats tour. I saw a truck for it today, but sadly, did not have my camera on me to get a picture.

If there are any Cats fans in the area, I'm always interested in meeting you! So far, the only person I've met who really knows about Cats absolutely loathes it. Damn. Oh well. I'll find Cats buddies around here, somewhere.

There is only one more story planned for the Ritzkin Arc after this… and it's going to be great! Up until the Ball, I had to be very careful to keep certain characters around and certain other characters not around (RIP, Simbol and Cattivo). Now that the Ball is past, though… I can _really _go all out.

In the meantime, please, please, please entertain yourself with "Shattered," by Wolfjet. This story is, as far as I am concerned, an official part of the Ritzkin Arc. You can find a link to it in my profile, or you can cut and paste and delete the spaces of this: w w w . f a n f i c t i o n . n e t / s / 3 7 4 1 7 4 0 / 1 / S h a t t e r e d "Shattered" fits into the Arc right after "The Protector," and it's a beautiful one-shot piece written from Gus' perspective of Simbol's death.

I love hearing from my readers, so please, keep in touch! Tell me what you're thinking about this Arc! And, just to tell you now, if you, like Wolfjet, want to write your own Ritzkin Arc story, the answer will always be HELL YEAH! Just give me credit for anything Ritzkiny, and send me a link!

I do not own Cats!

_**

* * *

** _

**Grizabella**

**

* * *

**

It's my job to protect the tribe. That is the role of the Protector, after all – that's why the title _is _Protector. I protect.

When Simbol died, I thought I'd never feel more helpless. I couldn't do a damn thing to keep him with us, to keep his life from slipping away. Surely, no feeling could be worse than that.

When Grizabella showed up, I realized I was wrong.

* * *

I've never met Grizabella as a Jellicle. All I knew about her, I learned from stories told to me by other cats. Tugger, especially, had many stories. She was his older sister, after all (half-sister, at least). 

Grizabella was a Glamour Cat, a cat so beautiful that everyone wanted to be near her. It went to her head, though, Tugger said, and she began to brag about her beauty. She'd claim she was far too beautiful for just anyone to associate with her, and she only wanted to associate with the beautiful and powerful cats. She was still very much a kitten, at the time, but in that precocious stage where your parents could do nothing right. Being the daughter of Deuteronomy, the granddaughter of the tribe leader, Exodus… that must have been hard for her. More often than not, she'd spend her days with her uncle, Leviticus.

After Exodus died, and Deuteronomy and Leviticus fell out of favor with each other, Grizabella ran away from the junkyard. She much preferred Leviticus' company over Deuteronomy's. I don't see why. Leviticus – _my _father – is a much more malevolent cat than Deuteronomy. He's very sly and crafty. The moment his dark eyes fall on you, you can just _feel _him stripping away your defenses, finding out what makes you tick and how best to attack it. Deuteronomy is the exact opposite, even though he looks so similar. When Deuteronomy looks at me, I can feel him building me up, silently supporting me and wishing for me to succeed, not for me to fail. I love that feeling. I can't get enough of Deuteronomy's presence. How could anyone run away from that?

Tugger says that Grizabella was just as wicked as Leviticus. He claims that she wished for the worst in other cats, and would laugh at any cat who made a mistake in her presence. He also said she fell in love with Leviticus, and that she became one of his mates. I doubt that. Mates in the Monnik tribe are rare, practically unheard of. She might have become one of Leviticus' favored queens. I'm sure he would have loved sinking his claws (among other things) into Deuteronomy's beautiful daughter.

Ever since she left the tribe, Grizabella's been a monster to the Jellicles. The older queens whisper to their kittens to behave themselves, or Grizabella will carry them away. The older toms watch over the queen-kits, scolding them if they start getting too vain. No one wants to see another Grizabella in the tribe.

The idea of Grizabella has become so ingrained among the Jellicles that even the newest members have picked up on it. I once saw Quaxo sitting by a mirror with Victoria, and he was instructing her on how to wash herself and then check in a mirror for spots – white fur shows dirt horribly – and then scolding her when she started to preen, telling her to "not become a Grizabella." I didn't think he even knew who she was. I suppose Tumble might have told him stories.

When the spring came, it was time for a Ball. Usually, Simbol led things… but this year, I was in charge. I was the Protector, after all, and Deuteronomy was too old to oversee the setup himself. Admetus was a lifesaver, though. He had helped Simbol prepare for the Ball every year since he was Victoria's age, and he knew what to do. He didn't do things _for _me, but he did continually point me in the right direction (and turn me around whenever I blundered). Much to my surprise, Quaxo was another invaluable assistant. He solved the problem of lighting the Ball, and even found some brightly-colored Christmas lights that would be perfect for decoration. He was such a help, that I named him my lieutenant for the night, in charge of escorting in all the cats (especially the older ones – Jennyanydots, Bustopher Jones, and Deuteronomy himself). Jellylorum had already asked to be in charge of helping Gus around. The old Theatre Cat really has grown to look (and act) his age. Simbol and Cattivo's deaths struck him hard. No one said it, but everyone was thinking it – he would be the cat chosen to go to the Heaviside Layer this year.

Everything during the Ball started off wonderfully. Sure, a human threw a shoe at us, but that wasn't anything we couldn't deal with. And Tugger interrupted Jennyanydots, but we were all expecting him to just butt in at some point.

We _weren't _expecting _Tugger _to be interrupted. No one would dare interrupt Tugger! He was the second-largest cat in the tribe now (Simbol had been larger, but now only Deuteronomy had more mass), and he was known to exact revenge on cats who upset him. When a grizzled queen appeared, we all held our breaths.

Quaxo ran forward, thinking he was supposed to escort her in, even though he obviously was confused and didn't know who she was… but from Tugger's reaction and the way the oldest of the Jellicles sucked in their breath, I realized who she was.

Grizabella.

The Glamour Cat.

The Jellicle-turned-Monnik.

A danger.

I was able to pull Quaxo back, and Skimbleshanks and Jenny batted away the curious paws of the kittens. Eventually, though, Grizabella turned her attention to me, opening her mouth and beginning to sing. Her eyes met mine… and I knew her. She was that queen who always curled beside Leviticus' armchair, the queen who'd dart out of view behind his throne if anyone looked at her for too long. Her eyes were dark, heavy and jaded, so obviously disillusioned by her years with the Monniks. It was an expression I often saw, if I caught a glimpse of my own face while thinking on my kittenhood. She regretted the Monniks. I _knew _she did.

I wasn't the only one who knew, apparently. Demeter, the beautiful goddess we rescued from the Monniks… she knew Grizabella. I had almost forgotten. Demeter _was _a Monnik, and, as they were both queens, there was a chance Grizabella had helped raise her. There was a chance Grizabella was Demeter's _mother_.

I was torn. On the one paw, I wanted to put down my claws, to welcome Grizabella back to the Jellicle tribe, but on the other… just the looks of scorn and disgust from the other Jellicles was enough to tell me that they would _not _approve of such a choice. What more could I do? I had to stand in her way, to keep her from getting too close to the Jellicles who had turned their backs on her.

I never thought it could happen. I never thought the Jellicles could _hate _a cat so thoroughly. I never thought they could so completely shun a cat – especially not one as old and sorrowful as Grizabella. Throughout the night, though, over and over, I saw it happening. From Plato and Tumblebrutus encouraging Pouncival (their youngest brother) to slice at her paw to Alonzo chasing her off during the actual Ball… over and over, she was pushed away.

Even more heartbreaking, though, was how she completely ignored Old Deuteronomy… and how he reached for her. She was his daughter, and, if the stories were true, he hadn't seen her since she was a kitten. So many years gone… and now she wouldn't even look at him.

And I… I couldn't do a single thing. I sympathized with Grizabella. I knew her plight. I _felt _it. I had experienced it myself! But… unlike Grizabella, it wasn't widely known that I was a Monnik. If I stood up and offered her my paw… what would happen to _me_? Could I risk it? I couldn't. I couldn't! I had too much to lose… far too much. As much as I hated it, I had to keep blocking her, keep her from reaching the Jellicles, as she so desperately wanted to. When she looked at me, though, when she met my eyes… I was so sure that she knew. That she recognized me as a fellow Monnik. She didn't blame me, though. Her gaze held no scorn when she looked at me. All it held was a sad acceptance. Her beauty was gone, torn to rags. What else did she have? Why else would the Jellicles bring her back in?

It was a kitten who shamed us all. Little Victoria, who had just become an adult at this Ball… Victoria was the one who did what I could not. When Grizabella returned in the early morning, when we were almost ready to choose the cat to ascend to the Heaviside Layer… it was Victoria who reacted the most to Grizabella's impassioned plea for forgiveness. It was Victoria who got to her feet and, after glancing back to make sure Deuteronomy wasn't mad at her for it (and I nodded, just a fractional tilt of my head – _please, Vicky, please…_), she darted forward and took Grizabella's paw.

Once one cat had done it, we all could, and there was something so moving about the sight of snowy-white Victoria beaming up at the grizzled Glamour Cat, and the expression of awe and wonderment on Grizabella's face. All the Jellicles rushed forward to touch her, to welcome her back to the tribe. Demeter stroked her back… and I took her paws to present her to her father. I squeezed gently, smiled, and she squeezed back, tears in her eyes. 'Thank you,' she mouthed to me, and I couldn't speak. All I could do was pass her over to Deuteronomy, to watch as he wrapped his arm around his daughter, as she took his paw. Everything worked out. I didn't mess up… and I didn't have to turn my back on Grizabella, either. Slowly, things were ending up just how they should be.

* * *

To Be Finished in The End … 


End file.
